Money Story: Graduation Announcements
We were college seniors, finishing our bachelor’s degrees quite a ways from home, I from Illinois and she from down South.
As we left the mail room, in our hands were college notices, inviting us to order announcements with the school logo embellished on top.
I wasn’t sending them out, seeing that the people I’d contact had just received my high school announcements four years ago and had seen little of me since. I told my friend.
Her response? Graduation announcements are an investment! People will send you money! You have to send them!
This bothers me for a few reasons, not that I’m blaming my friend at all. I think pretty much almost everyone sees it this way, even if they don’t vocalize it. Send graduation announcements = money. Send out invitations to people who won’t come to my wedding = presents. Have a shower = presents.
And I guess that’s not wrong, really. But I hate the mentality that anyone deserves or expects a gift. Then it’s not a gift, you know?
Filed under gifting, the everyday |
11 Responses to “Money Story: Graduation Announcements”
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Ohh, that bothers me too! I did send out graduation announcements, but it wasn’t for the money! Everyone I sent them to were people that had watched me grow up, and even though I was in college out of state they always asked my parents how I was doing and were wishing me well. I felt I owed it to them to inform them of the special occassion. I got money from a few of my aunts and uncles, but they gave it to me in person and not for the sake of just giving me money.
We were just recently trying to teach my cousin (she’s 6) that everyone doesn’t have to give you a present for your birthday, and that its a choice. What a challenge! Lol.
You know what else bothers me? The money envelope/greeting cards. Am I the only one? lol.
Yeah, and what about putting your registry information in your wedding invitation??
And some couples register for everything that they could ever possibly want. Then people feel that they have to choose something from that list. Things are so impersonal now. I remember going to bridal showers where we were just told what colors the couple was decorating with, and we picked out something special. That was nice.
My mother-in-law just called the other day, asking if the hubby’s cousin gave us a wedding present. If they gave a good one, she said, she would give their child a birthday present. If we hadn’t received a present, she was going to go to the party empty-handed. (I couldn’t remember, so the poor kid didn’t even get a card.)
This sort of one-up-ness makes me sick. I wish people would just be honest and generous with gifts - and being generous can mean putting time and thought into the gift, not just money.
My favorite wedding gift cost less than $15 - a spice rack and copies of the gifter’s favorite recipes. It was personal, thoughtful, and we use it all the time!
Glad to know I’m not alone, guys!
QL: especially when it’s a simple signed name, no message. Where’s the thought?
Amy: LOL, I know! The registry thing is way out of hand.
Stacey: I love what you said about your favorite wedding gift. That’s such a creative, sweet gift idea–I just may steal a variation on it.
Fishing for gifts bothers me. A gift should be something a person genuinely wants to give. That’s not to say that all registeries are bad though. A gift registry can help in avoiding duplicate gifts and give people an idea of what is really needed. We didn’t go crazy with our baby registry and gratefully our friends and family were great in helping us out. Even with the registry we still had lots of duplicate gifts including a duplicate car seat. In the case of a baby there really are certain items new parents need to start out. Of course a couple can go too far with any registry.
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I sent out grad notices for college, but not high school. The only reason I did so was because it came in a package deal with a diploma frame, alumni membership, etc. If I hadn’t gotten the bonus grad announcements I wouldn’t have sent any out. Since I got them, I sent them to relatives and I was shocked when I got gifts in return. I had no idea that people provided gifts upon graduation! My sister didn’t send any notes out and she only got one gift from those same relatives. When I finished my grad degree, I didn’t send any notes out since I didn’t want anyone to feel obligated to get me anything and it was only 1 year later.
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This week’s Post Secret made me think of this.
http://bp2.blogger.com/_a7jkcMVp5Vg/SC-mz2xSpkI/AAAAAAAAE6A/TIsuPwXOMaE/s1600-h/shower.jpg
That’s priceless, Finance Girl. Thanks for linking it here!