There was a lot of cost involved with moving out on my own, although I was surprised that I was also able to save on certain things. For example, I always paid for cable (granted it was only half the bill) when living with roommates, but now that I’m on my own, I could decide I didn’t need it. I also no longer have to deal with other people’s wasteful electricity habits affecting my electric bill. But mostly, it was expensive, especially at first. I had to buy a lot of furniture, tools, dishes, kitchen stuff, and all the other little things that you probably take for granted at your parents’ house.

The one thing that I never found myself being was lonely. When in a relationship, I found that having my own place actually allows me to spend more time with my boyfriend. We can lounge around the apartment, cook a meal together, etc without worrying about getting on someone else’s nerves. Since I’m in a long distance relationship now, and my boyfriend spends all weekend almost every weekend at my place, I’m not sure if I could even be dating him if I had roomates. I don’t know many people that would be ok with adding an extra roomate that often. When single, living alone was actually an encouragement to go out and spend time with friends and pursue my interests. I didn’t have the excuse of “well, I’ll just chill with my roomates” and that actually got me out of the house more times than not.

Emm: Well after a comment like that, you’re definitely being added to my blogroll. How did I not add you before now? I can relate to what you said about your friends marrying young (although, oh my gosh, you’re 20 and your friends are married??). Most of my close college friends are married–some starting families. In my circles, it seems, you live with your parents, go to college and get married. In that order and by the time you’re 23. I’m 25, so I don’t really know how it’s supposed to work. Thanks for writing out your thoughts!

i moved out so my over-protective parents could begin to see me as a more independent person. this was rough, especially coming from an Asian background where even I thought I would live with them until i got married. i wrestled letting go of this expectation, and at 20, i found myself where I am now.

i do get homesick though. a lot! no one to cook for me, struggling with my own laziness. it does get lonely, but at the same time, i’m not lonely because i miss my parents. our relationship has improved. i’m limited to what i can do with my suite, because it’s so short (6′5!) and i know i’ll eventually be living back home. but the time on my own has proven to be invaluable, not only domestically, but also financially. i would have never taken accountability for my own life skills, or my finances. not to say this couldn’t be done at home, but it probably would have taken longer.

i have a few married friends, that tell me they wish they could have this period in their lives, a space between home and marriage. i guess i don’t appreciate it as much now, but perhaps i will eventually.

oh my, i think i wrote an essay on this as well! good question!

So far, I haven’t been lonely. Granted, The Boy spends most nights at my place (he has a lot of roommates), but still…I come home from work and am usually alone in my apartment for a few hours, and there are days when he doesn’t come over. And those times are just fine. I was surprised at how much I enjoyed just having quiet time to myself, whether to read or knit or bake cookies or watch HGTV — things I love to do and can do in my own space. No fighting over the TV, no roommates making noise; just my own space in which to do whatever I want. No asking the roommates if it’s ok to have people over, or worrying they’ll want to crash my dinner party. I am a fairly social person, and in college I swore I’d never live alone, sure I’d be too lonely or need people around, but honestly, I had no idea how much I would love it.

Plus, it’s been really fun to decorate and get it set up just how I want it — not having to compromise design choices or accommodate someone else’s stuff.

I could go on and on (and already have) about the joys of living alone, but I don’t want to go overboard
Just for comparison’s sake, I live in a 1-bedroom, 1-bathroom in Berkeley. Hardwood floors, my own water heater, really cute original detailing (carved wood ceiling beams!), off-street parking. $1100 per month, which for Berkeley is average-to-cheap. My only gripe? No laundry room.